For the opening of the Triathlon today I was asked to bring nothing but myself. Which is fortunate because I have a pretty good track record in that department. I hoped they wouldn't notice the fact that I brought Mary. I said Mary no La Cucaracha. She said OK Livi no problems I won't play La Cucaracha all day. She did that with a pretty good spirit I thought, despite her apparent fondness for La Cucaracha.

I went through the stalls, most were food, and in between there were some groups forming, some of them talking together, and other showing off their talents (presumably to scare their opponents). Some were lifting their wives with one hand, some were boxing each other. I don't mean as in seeing who can enclose the other in cardboard the fastest, although that would make for good viewing. Then I came to a group that featured Des in it, and they all looked sad. I asked him, "Des, is everything ok?" Des said "yes, but we can't practice anymore because we forgot how much we liked cheese."

Then I went to fetch some food. There were mini hamburgers (they called them sliders, I believe that's because of their poor construction), waffles, pancakes, and donuts. Also there were sandwiches, cakes, and fresh fruit. I had a bit of laughternoon bree, then settled down on a deck chair to watch the fete thing. I'm pretty sure the word fete is meant to have some weird punctuation, but I'm not French, so I pronounce it like fey-tay.

And then there was this loud music that started to play, like cats playing trumpets. Now I don't know if cats can actually play trumpets, but that was what I imagined cats playing trumpets would sound like. And the cats were playing I WANT TO WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS. I think it has some other name, but I can never get the Spanish part. Ah, I said to myself, these string lights everywhere DO look like holiday lights, don't they?

How do you keep a talking car quiet? You put her in a garage and let her talk to a mechanic.

- Livi