The fourth froyo was a masterpiece in pyrotechnic work. It was mostly white, and so the colors were a bit plain, but every now and then a couple green sparks kept flying out from the tin foil. Whatever they put in that stuff. Therefore I gave Yo-Yo-Bert Boysenberry Ripple a four stars because of all the brilliant light. I've also now pierced each lid with a fork. No reason.

The third was nothing to write home about, so I'll just skip that one entirely. It was a cheap brand anyhow, so no great expectations there. Then I put in the fifth.

Mrs. Robertson, you see, came out with a new packaging recently, as in yesterday. All her flavors (except for low-fat, but that's not yoghurt in my mind) were metamorphosized into the new recycling friendly format with improved lid design. Not sure what that means. I mean, a lid either keeps things in or it doesn't, right? Anyhow, the foil was flat and smooth instead of being crinkly, so I thought oh well maybe this will be a boring display like the last. Not that boredom is a distraction for the scientist, of course, I mean all scientists are completely unbiased. So then I put Mrs. Robertson's new-and-improved pear-and-cinnaminnaminnamum into my oven of the future, hit 30s, hit GO. And did it go. Red and green and white and pink. Also blue. It was quite the show. Sparks flew and colors came and went, and I watched with wide-eyed (impartial) amazement. The only thing that stopped the show was my microwave.

Oh my dear microwave. How will I go on without you? You were irreplaceable.

I said were, because tomorrow I'm going to an appliance discount sale.

- Livi