I went to church feeling like a pile of discombobulated junk. Though I spose junk is discombobulated already, that's what makes it junk. It had just been a terrible week for no reason, some reason, every reason. Just a really hard and long week. Although I had a good talk to Mrs. Stevenson before the service started about all sorts of things, and like it is when you have a lot on your mind, you ramble. I mean, I don't ramble very often, it was unusual of me. We were talking about our weeks, and our devotionals, when she kind of drifted off into talking about her health I think, or maybe I had drifted off into thinking about parcels. She was mentioning how she had actually been feeling a bit run down over the last couple of days, when I was at that moment just remembering how the man had knocked at my door, and had said "from Ms. Paige," so I laughed.

Mrs. Stevenson, I hope to talk to you again.

I was thinking about this all during the service, and kicking myself. L said are you alright, you can't keep your legs still. I said I'm Russian. Then the songs began, but I have to admit I was kind of absent minded. Then the sermon started, and the passage was second Philippians. So I phlipped to Philippians. He humbled himself and carried the cross. That is, he gave up his happiness and glory, his relationship with the Father, his authority. He subtracted it from himself, and added it to us. And I had to ask at that moment, why? Now I know that when I subtract things, it's generally not my call, like accidentally subtracting flour from a cake recipe. But he purposely subtracted. And to add to accounts of people who didn't like him at all.

There was something in that sermon that let me laugh at my cake recipes when I got home. I went to bed with a more of a spring. It's good to know there's more to life than failing at it.

- Livi