As I walked into the grocery shop to have an interview, I had a good look around at the produc. I had hired an eye two days before, so I had some secret knowledge up my sleeve. Which is to say, in my brain, although my brain is not up my sleeve. Although my Mom probably thought it was sometimes. Hey, don't you go agreeing with her.
The first thing that I was was coconuts. A whole tub of coconuts. Green and brown coconuts. The green ones are young coconuts that are good for drinking, and the brown coconuts are old and good for making desecrated coconut, or bongo drums. Then I looked around for the counter, I assumed this would be the best place to ask where the manager would be, or whoever would be interviewing me at Dave&Dave, but I was mistaken. Because he came right up to me and asked if he could help me. I looked at his name badge, and it said John, manager. I said oh yes I'm Olivia Paige, here for an interview actually. He said oh it's you, great! I'm John. I said I'm Olivia, but please call me Livi. He said great to have you Livi, would you wait here a second? I said sure, and waited 1000 milliseconds. During that time quite a bit happened, but that's what happens when you're bitten by a spider. After a while another man came up to me, and asked the same question. I was about to say that I was here for an interview, when I noticed his namebadge said Jon, manager. I said sorry I thought I just spoke to the manager, I must have misread his name badge. The man said oh no, that would be John with a h. It's confusing I know, we still haven't sorted it out. Oh, here he is. "Hey John!" "Hey Jon! This is Olivia Paige here, the person we're interviewing today." "Ah, great! Well, come with us, Olivia." "Livi, if you don't mind." I still find it weird for anyone but my parents to call me that.
So the two managers led me into their break room. Surprisingly, there were no shattered monitors, plates, or even coffee mugs. It was an underwhelming break room. You should have seen my room when I was five. John started, "hey, so you applied for the position of stockperson?" "Yeah, that's right, I've had a few months experience being the assistant to a family-owned convenience store up North." "That was Des, right?" "Uh, yeah." "I'm sorry. We heard what happened. That's one reason why we thought to interview you. You also had some experience entering stock into the system, the agency told us?" Ah, the fairies. You can't escape them. "That's right. I wasn't in charge of the system, but I did help to scan things in, and learned some basics in the time I was there of how the system works. We handled daily deliveries together, and stock management." "That's excellent," said John, "and you would have been in customer service then I assume too?" "Yes, lots and lots of customers!"
Jon now was the one to speak. "So, tell me, what would you do if you had thirteen melons in a delivery, but the docket only said twelve?" "Well, I'd bring it up with the store manager." "Would it be right to let the staff take it home?" "No, that's not my call." John said, "You only have two hours to close. A staff member asks if you can do a job for them that wasn't on your to-do because he's got an urgent call. He needs your help." "He needs to ask you first. I'm not a manager." Then they asked me some more about my stocking experience, and what I knew of the way their company worked. "Well," I said, "your company was founded by two people kind of like you, I believe, Dave Jonson and Dave Johnson, two farmers who went into business together because of their good produce. I'm assuming your business is on the same idea of the best produce." Jon laughed. He said "yes, we're both grandsons on either side. My last name is Jonson without a h, his is with a h. Ask our fathers." John said, "Do you think you might be a good fit in our business, and why?" "Well, I've worked in retail before in stocking and customer service, and I enjoyed it." "Good enough answer for me. What do you think, Jon?" Jon nodded, then said, "do you have any questions at all?" "Yes, how do you know which John is being called?" They both laughed, and John said, "well, that's a problem that hasn't been solved in twenty years. I'm John, but what do I call him?" "Jon-n-n-n," I said. "You're hired," John said. "Hey, I didn't agree to that name," Jon-n-n-n said.
I shook John, and Jon-n-n-n's hands, and went out very happy. I believe I may have a new job at Dave&Dave, working under John Johnson and Jon Jonson, also known as John and Jon-n-n-n.