PAIGE 196 - WHO AM I

Mary said to me, how was art class in high school? I said full of green hands. Also blue, sometimes yellow. It was the first time I got highlights, and unintentionally. She said did you do painting? And I said Mary this had better not be about what I think it is. She said what did you think it was? I sighed, and said well art class had SOME painting in it, also drawing and random essays about dead artists and how they liked the color blue more than others. She said do you like the color blue more than others? I said not really, I think maybe green is my favorite color. She said well then you're not an artist. I said well I guess not. What's your favorite color Mary? Blue.

Well, I suddenly felt the need for lunch, and so popped some lasagne into the oven for 4:44, and then went off to flip through the new thin book again, but didn't come up with any new places to call. I haven't heard back from the trial existence people, not sure if I will actually because I'm not on great terms and conditions with the fairies, but you can't be great at everything I guess. So I sat down at this blog and started to write, well I'm writing now actually. Not now because as you're reading I've already finished, but right now as the words are coming up on my screen. And I was having this sudden thought oh hey I'm writing a blog, I'm like an artist, a web-artist, an author or something right, I'm pretty cool, how many peeps write a blog? Then I remembered everything I've been blogging about. Um, wow. You know, for someone who doesn't have a whole lot to be prideful about, I've got to admit I got pretty proud there for a moment. It's stupid and makes no sense, I mean I'm just like everyone else, probably twice as disaster-prone though, and still I was having those thoughts about being better than everyone else. Wow. I'm sorry, God. Who am I? Yeah, I always get proud when I think of who I am as what I do, like a dimensionating stockperson, or a disqualificating blogger, like hey I'm unique everybody! I'm feeling pretty stupid now to write this.

Who I am is just a human who's loved by God. Really, anything else apart from that, I mean saying who I am, just goes wrong. I'm not even dimensionating, or a stockperson anymore. Or disqualificating. I'm Livi Paige, a daughter of the king, and that's enough for me.

- Livi.