"Hi there Absalom! Yep, did some calling around to my good friend L, who I call the twelfth, she knows a farmer who is now retired, but once upon a time on a farm lot not very far away, actually a couple blocks, he sowed corn. He also grew it, harvested it, and ate it. Otherwise I guess the whole sowing thing would be a bit pointless. Here's some advice I got from him.
He said corn, first of all, is very delicate with weeds and stuff. So before you even go planting, kill all the weeds in the soil. First water the ground to make all the weeds come up, then after about two weeks, kill them all. I know that's pretty harsh, I mean the weeds didn't do anything, but this is the modern world you know. Second, he said corn doesn't take a transplant well, so forget all that surgical apparatus and just chuck it in the ground. But not before frost, because corn and frost do not mix, except in the freezer aisle I told him, and he said true. But even now they have some frost free freezers, so you know. Third, the average germination rate for corn is 75 percentages. So sow a third more or so because some of it won't germinate, or birds or worms will take some. He also said watch out for worms and bugs, spray a bit of vegetable oil and dish detergent mixed with water on the corn when you get the hairy bits starting to show. I think that was it. I'm happy I remembered it all, actually.
Oh yep, I dropped by the bank, well not my bank since I'm still not with the local bank, but close enough to get an idea of a card. I've got the brochure with me now and some stamps, let me know where you want me to post it to. Hope to hear from you soon! Livi Paige."
Then I went on with the rest of my day until about dinner, when I checked it again.
"Dear Livi Paige, I most thankful to know all about corn. Yes corn is lovely very good, popcorn too. Since I am prince I need lots corn to feed people, because prince are in charge of corn and also charge of people. Thank you for brochure, but cannot send it because our post mail is broken, I cannot get mail. So please tell me about the numbers on your card. Thank you lovely Livi Paige. I am Absalom Kumar, thank you."