PAIGE 164 - DRAG RACING CYCLISTS

I was almost feeling well today. Still not better better, but well enough to go for a walk or a drive, so I did. Mary was so over the moon, possibly the stars and the multiverse also if she'd had been bitten by a spider, that she was practically revving her engine before I had even got in the car. Of course I got in the driver seat so I wouldn't get any weird looks when I wasn't driving. Well, she did get out of the garage a bit quick, I said Mary slow down, I need to press the garage key button to close the roller door. So I did, and then we left off. There wasn't anything in particular I wanted to do, since I still didn't want to pass my germs around, so I said Mary we can go for a drive wherever you want, I don't really care. She said really Mom? that sounds great, and took us on a route around some backstreets I've never been before. I said Mary how do you know these streets? She said I have MGPS. I said oh yeah right I forgot that. I said I wonder if humans can get GPS. She said she didn't think so, and I think she's right. You need a functioning inbuilt direction for that to work, and my brain doesn't have that program installed. Well, as we got out onto the roads, she was so excited that she revved her engine at the first thing she saw pulling up beside her.

It was a cyclist. Now, I'm not exactly sure how she thinks you can drag race cyclists. Cyclists aren't that fast to start off with anyhow compared to cars, but Mary didn't seem to know, or to care. The man looked at us, and I smiled and said sorry my foot slipped, and then I told Mary to be quiet. She said why won't he rev? I said I don't think cyclists can rev. She said all they have to do is pull the redline tangent, it's easy. I said ah well sure Mary whatever you say.

When we got home (Mary enjoyed her ride a lot, maybe too much) I called the agency. Now I half expected (50%) the mission impossible theme song to start playing while I was on hold, but no it was just some regular classical music. I said well maybe agents these days like classical, they have style anyway. Eventually some lady answered me and said hi welcome to our job searching agency, and I talked to her about wanting to join, but not being on any benefits, and was that possible, and oh I don't live in the city. She said sure are you in one of the neighboring towns? I said yeah I'm a Russian. She said sorry? I said oh whoops I mean I'm in the Falls. Sparrow Falls. She said oh sure no problems, and then went on to tell me about their company and all that they do. When she was finished I said yep sign me up, send me the papers, take my blood, my DNA, my 32 microwaves, I'm in. She said that won't be necessary, I'll just send you the papers. Wow, and I thought being part of an agency was all that top-secret stuff.

- Livi.