I said to Mary, Mary I need a mental break. Otherwise I'm going to break and go mental. I have been calling and reading so many classifieds that I think my brain is now classified as unreadable. She said what was it before? She got me there. I told her, well I want to go out, do anything except be here. Mary said what kind of thing? I said do you have an idea? She said I want to go to the mechanic. I said something I want to do also. She said the mechanic can come here. Well, she had a point, I thought, so I said well Mary you know what I'll call the DL, and see if they want to come round. Or even if they come square or semicircle, I won't discriminate.
So I gave the DL a call, and they said they would be delighted to come. I said oh, great! then I looked at the clock and said oh great, because it was nearly dinner and that would mean I have to cook. But fear not, future oven to the rescue! I had some pasta sitting across from my shoe-phone which I dethawed, and voila! and hey pesto! it was a delicious Italian meal.
The door rang at five to five. I said oh no Mary what have you done now? She said I have been watching the chicken cross the road. I said wait really? and ran down to see. In fact, it was true. There was a chicken, and it was crossing the road. We watched beside each other this spectacle for a while. Then we saw a farmer chasing after it with an open cage. Now you know the answer to the riddle.
Then the door rung again. I suddenly realized I had forgot to open it. I said oops, coming! as I ran up the stairs. Please not a spacetime rift, please not a spacetime rift. It was DL. I said ah, welcome non-interdimensional travelers, to my humble abode! They said uh thanks. I don't know why they precede everything with an uh nowadays. It must be some kind of cultural spin or accent the Russians have.
So we sat down to pesto pasta, and I said to them actually Mary's been waiting for you, I know the garage isn't exactly an eating place but... and they didn't have an issue with it. No, the DL and the M get along pretty well these days, they're a riot. Sometimes I wonder if the police are far off. D said to M well I'm working on a new car (which was actually an old car), and it has all these things and things... well I don't remember what he said because I'm not a mechanic, but M seemed to understand the D, and thus more D and M ensued, with me and L a bit out of the picture, so we talked about other things. I said L, how was your day? She said it was a day. I said that exciting huh? She said oh it was all right, it's just I'm waiting for two things, and they both seem a bit far off at the moment. I said yeah I understand. I'm waiting slash looking for a job. maybe waiting is part of the reason we're looking? I mean I remember when I was five I figured out this way I could get gumballs from my Dad's vending machine instead of having to wait a week for pocket money. It involved bottle tops and a sledgehammer, that's all I can say without giving away details that could beget a counterfeiting industry. But you know what, I didn't learn to trust my Dad and learn wisdom from him, and that year I was a pretty stupid kid. So maybe waiting and trusting is for our best. She said yeah that's true, that's what we have to remember, don't we? Patience is a virtue for a reason, I mostly know this from the times I was not patient. But to look at it in the positive, definitely that's something I can wait for.
When I was five I also figured out how to make instant creme bruleee with nothing but a packet of custard and Dad's welding torch. But that's a story for another time.